Letting Go

One of the reasons I love hiking so much is that it is somewhat of a solo activity which allows me time to think. Sure, we all think every day. Every waking moment. As I write this I am also half thinking... what will I have for lunch? Should I exercise after work? However, what I mean is real thinking. Deep thinking. A kind of reflective inventory of self.

I recalled that on this particular hike I thought a great deal about expectations. The expectations that society may have of us. Expectations from our family, friends, and relationships. Though in all what it boils down to is our own expectations of ourselves and what grounds us and provides guidance in our daily lives. Let me elaborate.

I was a model child. Pulled straight A's right from kindergarten. Graduated top of my class. went to university on a full scholarship. In my high school yearbook I think I was voted "Most Likely To Succeed". Even before I graduated I was already recruited and had multiple job offers to choose from. This was the result of a lot of hard work. And making choices to optimize my time to my objectives.

While I have no regrets about the hard work I put in as a child/young adult, I also think that if I could return to student days I would do a few things a little differently. We can't go back in time. However, we can look forward! Looking forward I'd like to let go of the expectations that others may have of me and be guided by the goals and objectives that I set for myself. My definition of happiness. My decision on how to achieve it.

As I fell slowly to the back of the hiking group I mused that I felt okay. I was okay to be last/slow. As one of the younger and more athletic climbers I'm sure people would've thought that my climb time would err on the shorter side. But who really cares? It's not a goal of mine to beat/set a time record. Nor do I care about the bragging rights of completing the hike in record time. I was perfectly content, alone with my thoughts, taking in the scenery.

Letting go of expectations has been a profound source of happiness. Whatever it is you may be grasping to, if it doesn't serve you well I urge you to try letting go. Slowly and at your own time. Do life for you.